“I learned so much during my battle with severe mental health. 

What is mental health? The use of the term mental illness strengthens the stigma creating a much wider us vs them polarisation message. It’s as though people that experience poor mental health are different, weaker than the rest of people in society. I’m not saying that mental illness does not exist, lots of people are fighting hard fought battles with real mental illnesses, debilitating problems of mental health. However, for the vast majority of people suffering from the most common of mental health problems they are either not getting any help or the help that they are getting is not fit for purpose, perhaps because it serves someone else? 

The questions should be, what help do I need, who is going to provide it and who is looking out for me? Bearing in mind that sometimes it can become so overwhelming that you lose the ability to care for yourself.

Unfortunately, no one is immune from problems with mental health. Of course, some are more susceptible than others but suffering from poor mental health doesn’t make you weak. In fact, the opposite is true. I found out that when your mental health takes a nose-dive, you feel entirely alone and despite there being millions of people in exactly the same position you feel socially and emotionally isolated. It’s estimated that 1 in 4 people suffer from depression and it’s only the people that come forward for help that get counted! From my own research I learned that there is “no convincing evidence that antidepressants are effective” and this has recently been confirmed in a report by University College London (UCL). So where does that leave someone experiencing poor mental health? In my personal experience at the mercy of a whole host of solutions, selling me my life back. 

I could not find a compelling explanation for why I was feeling the way I was feeling? Why I was thinking the way I was thinking? Why I was behaving the way I was behaving? I could find snippets of information, nuggets here and there, but most of the time I would need to sign up, subscribe or sell an organ.

What was it I was getting exactly? What was it meant to do for me? Why was I doing what was being prescribed? Why was that helpful? It wasn't working and sometimes that would just increase my sense of shame. I felt ashamed because these prescribed solution’s weren’t working, I believed I was broken. Some of the free stuff for example, go outside, forest bathe, exercise, they didn’t work. I had either tried these solutions or I was physically and/or mentally unable to do so. Then there’s the fads!! Wear this bracelet, tell yourself positive affirmations, stand under a freezing cold shower, go wild swimming - I grew up during long hot summers, splashing around in freezing cold burns (streams) in my knickers (underwear) and I don’t remember feeling GREAT!

I didn’t know what I needed, where to get it and If I got it, I didn’t know what it was, why it would be helpful and why I should give it a go? It was always just the ANSWER. All of these answers were against a backdrop of me being unable to think properly due to the extreme feeling of overwhelm in my entire body. It is terrifying when you find yourself at your most vulnerable! When you feel you can’t be there for yourself, for other people, you don’t know where to turn, who to trust, what to do or who to believe.

I could not find anywhere and I looked, I looked hard. I found some helpful information and there are lots of really, really good, well intentioned people but I couldn’t find anywhere that brought together what mental heath actually is, where it comes from and what you can do about it. Considering the size of the market for mental health, over 100 years of investment and research, it’s staggering that we are not much further forward with what the problem of mental health is. Albert Einstein said, “If I had an hour to save the world, I’d spend 55 minutes figuring out the problem”. Today we seem to be comfortable throwing darts in the dark despite the suffering of so many! The lack of helpful information or resources to help address the underlying problem of mental health and wellbeing of all individuals and families is unbelievable. If 1 in 4 people experience poor mental health, the chances are that the other 3 in 4 are impacted by it. It’s all around us and affects us all to some degree, in every family, in every home, in every street and in every community; yet people silently go around, fumbling in the dark, unsupported, ignored and trying a whole host of things that you later find out don’t help, take antidepressants as an example.

The advice that’s offered is talk to someone but who and what help can they offer? Have they experienced unbearable sensations in their body? Do they understand the impact of feelings and do they know how to overcome that? Do you trust them enough to tell them your deepest, darkest secrets? Can you tell them that you feel so different to everyone else, that you feel so lonely and so isolated that when you open your eyes in the morning you find the thought of potentially what is to come so unbearable, that you just want the world to stop so that you can get off! If you do talk to someone, be it a friend, relative, neighbour or a colleague, what advice would they give to you? In which direction would they point you?

As human beings we are designed to protect ourselves against any perceived vulnerability. We also want to be seen as strong and brave, not weak and vulnerable. We project and protect this public image at all costs. We mask our true feelings to family, friends, neighbours, colleagues and even strangers on social media! We reinforce the social climate where it is still taboo to ask for help when struggling on any level and when you really need help, when it’s all going Pete Tong, where do you go? 

This is so, so important. This really could be life or death for some people! I’m asking YOU ehnoo, everyday people, every human, the person in the street, the influencers, the business leaders, pop stars, celebrities and gurus that traverse social media, please help get the message out there in your community. Let’s start de-mystifying mental health! We all deserve better because we are all in this together. The mental health epidemic is growing for a number of reasons. That’s why I set up ehnoo! I want people to know ehnoo (#knowehnoo) what mental health is, where it comes from and what you can do about it. Unless we begin to understand what mental health actually is, then the epidemic is only going to continue and the effects felt on our children and our children’s children. 

The goal is simple. To help people access the support that they need to help improve their mental health ehnoo! You may be reading this and thinking that this is just another solution to add to the list of the many already out there. Our only aim, as a not for profit organisation is to help those that suffer with the most common of mental health problems.

I said at the start that I learned so much during my battle with severe mental health, one of the things I learned is that I had to learn how to be kind to myself and like anything that needs to be learned, it requires practice.

Please remember to try to be kind to yourself, it’s free!

Paul